Changes

Those of you who know me well know that I am not super crazy about change. The older I get, the more I come to accept it, but in most cases I can't seem to find a way to welcome it with open arms like I should. However, coming here has already taught me to deal with so much change.

Clearly, there are the obvious changes... I have to learn to speak a language that is so incredibly different from my native tongue.... I have to eat a lot of rice, and a lot of noodles, and I have to use chopsticks...If I want to go somewhere, I can't just get in my car and go--I have to ride a motorcycle, or Tuk-Tuk, or walk...I have to make new friends.... I have to be the boss... I have to bargain for fruits and vegetables... I have to live with no air conditioning...

These changes are the big things you think about when you pack up your entire life and move to another country. But right now, for me, the big changes are easier to deal with than the little, day to day changes that are slowly creeping into my life.

On Monday of this week, one of my little girls came into the classroom with her haircut. Previously, she had long hair down to her back which she usually wore in two pig-tails or braids, sometimes with bows. Now, her hair is cut shoulder length, and she wears just a headband. She was a beautiful child before, but now, with her hair cut short, she is absolutely gorgeous and looks so grown up. When I first saw her, I felt like such a mom because I couldn't believe that my baby looked so grown up! I know this feeling from the many moms that I know, and when you are a teacher for a certain amount of time, your students become your children.

But it got me thinking about all the little changes that are occurring here, and suddenly I got a panicky feeling that my time in Cambodia was going by so fast, and I wasn't even paying attention. It's been four months since I have arrived, and already so much has changed at the school, at the University (where I live), and even in the town of Sihanoukville.

At LIS, the teachers are doing a great job of making the classrooms look more like classrooms, we can see improvements in our students, and new, wonderful teachers have come and this has allowed us to change the schedule so our school day is more normal. Not everything has been easy, and some of the changes at the school have really felt like a battle, but the little changes have slowly added up and I have realized that Life International School is moving forward. God has such amazing things planned for this school, most definitely not by my efforts, or anyone else's, but by His infinite sovereignty and grace, He is bringing all of the right people here at the right time.

Life Schools, or Cambodia Life Mission Organization, is the larger ministry that Life International School is a part of, and I have slowly been learning that the nature of this mission is one of change. So many people come and go.... teachers come and serve, and then go back to their home country.... missionaries come and stay anywhere from a couple weeks to many months, but then also return to their homes.... University students graduate and seek out exciting new opportunities both in Cambodia or abroad...even our international students will attend school for a while, but then have to go back to their home countries.

Once I arrived here, I selfishly thought the world I immediately fell in love with always be the same. This just goes to show how much I fight against change in my life. I thought that since God had called me all the way across the world, He would create an environment for me where my work would stay the same, and the people would stay the same, and I would just be content for two years to do the work God had called me to do, without ever having to deal with immense changes in my environment or community. Sure, God could teach me things about Himself, and myself, and other people, but for some reason I really think I expected this to happen while everything around me stayed the same.

But the truth is that God has never promised me that things would always be the same. He has promised me that HE will stay the same, amidst all the changes and emotions that come with living in a broken world. The more I think about it, of course I want God as the constant in my life, even though everything changes. People come and go, relationships change and grow, but God remains the same. And it actually makes me smile a lot that he chose to remind me of this lesson by way of a little girl's haircut :).

On a happier note, the one thing that has remained constant in the past four months is the amazing community of teachers at LIS. I am so privileged to work with this group of people. Here is some of us after we helped decorate for the University's "Smart Boy and Smart Girl Pageant."